Have a good day!

Hello fuzzbutts!

It’s the end of the day and you lay your head down. You got a lot done today but you don’t feel so good about it. Your mind wanders around to the other things you didn’t do. Suddenly you’re in that limbo where you’re tired but you also feel bad for neglecting this or that so now you’re kinda resisting going to sleep. It’s a terrible mindset to have because it hurts your sleep and doesn’t help you feel any better. You’re practically drowning in guilt!

So how do we take care of that? Start off your day with writing down the things you want to get done. Take the time to think about your day, the time you have, and what you need to finish in order to actually feel like you had a good day. These things will jump out at you when you wake up in the morning. You focus on those tasks, get things done, and you’ll feel so much better at the end of your day. Sometimes it might just be one thing. Sometimes you might feel like doing NOTHING would be a good day because you’re such a busy vixen and, so long as that’s actually what you feel would make a good day, make sure you do that.

Then, you make to make an agreement with yourself that you will do those tasks and be guilt free, regardless of how you spend the rest of your day. The reason is that if we actually manage to accomplish our goals, we think about something else we could have done and then feel bad when we think about not accomplishing that last thing. This also means you need to pick your daily goals appropriately. Pick enough that you can actually get them done without aiming so low that you don’t make any progress.

Good luck, fuzzbutts!

It’s the New Year! Time for a New You!

Well it’s the second day of the new year! Hope you did alright in 2018. Now that we’re both becoming more active and productive with our lives, it’s time to look ahead to the rest of 2019. You’ve gone through some of your goals for 2018 to review how you did and maybe you’ve been putting together some goals for 2019. If you haven’t got your plan going forward, I recommend you get started. The sooner, the better!

One thing to keep in mind, as you align your various goals, is to envision yourself as the ideal you. How do you behave? What are your hobbies? What kind of work do you do? Imagine your ideal life for yourself. If you find it difficult to picture or detail your thoughts, then just pick somebody you know who you want to be more like. You’re not them and won’t ever be them but they have certain qualities you wish you would have or develop. Then work out your goals to help yourself embody those aspects. Are they disciplined? Maybe start with a set sleeping/waking schedule. Are they charismatic and friendly? Plan a goal that revolves around being more social. Do they keep things or drama from getting to them? Research some personal development articles or books to learn about how to deal with those situations. Are they learning something you want to learn? Start learning it yourself!

When working on yourself, you can find somebody to compare yourself against at the START so you can get a bearing on your life but then stop comparing yourself to them from that point onward. You can only really compare yourself against YOU. Compare how much you’ve developed yourself against who you were yesterday. If you don’t feel like you took any steps forward, then you have to assess and figure out a way to move ahead!

I’ve given myself a few goals this year and a new one I added was to move back out from the folks house this year. I’m going to start looking for a new apartment in March. The folks are great but I don’t see myself staying here for another 2 years to build up enough money to buy a condo. I’ve been looking for a new job around most of the country but haven’t had much luck with the process which makes me think my career isn’t far enough along for companies to want to import me from California. So if I haven’t found anything by March, I’m moving out, signing a year lease, and then being the best darn chemist at my current job that I can possibly be.

I hope you’re coming along nicely in reaching your goals and ideal self! Feel free to share or reach out to me if you want to talk about it!

Have fun, furries!

The Furry Image

Hello fuzzbutts!

Stuff keeps making the rounds on Twitter lately so I wanted to take some time to talk about the image of furries.

It’s no secret that people outside the fandom look in on furries and see cringe. I see it too! Furries see it enough that we’re supposedly one of the hardest groups for the media to reach now. A friend of mine who spoke to the media regarding a criminal case in SoCal told me the journalist said furries are harder to get a hold of than violent gang members. Whatever the press hears about is usually negative so they report the negative and the cycle continues.

So a few things to improve the furry image.

Less cringe

First up is being less cringe-y in general. Be more social and encounter more people. Reserve yourself a bit when out in public. Recognize that people will think you’re odd right off the bat but acting insane around people will give them a negative impression. The whole “Who cares what they think?” attitude is pretty big in this fandom but at the same time they’ll complain the media is what makes us look bad. So realize that the meetups and cons aren’t as much of a bubble as you think and that your actions contribute to the outside world’s view of furries as a whole.

Engage

The media! Don’t answer anything weird (asking about zippers on fursuits) but if it’s a decent question then answer it reasonably. Considering things like CSI or MTV portrayed us like some kind of sex cult, it’s not unreasonable to think the media might be genuinely curious if that’s true. Then again, they can’t report that if you don’t actually suggest that! Remember that anyone you talk to is considering you a representative of the fandom so behave in a way that shows the rest of us in the best light. Not just the person you’re speaking to but if it’s on video, you’ll be the representative to anyone who sees the video!

Ostracize

What? Yeah. There’s too many reports lately of certain furries being very involved in the fandom who turn out they have a criminal record or engage in the worst kinds of activities. Don’t want people to think actual animals are a sexual fetish? Banish any furries who engage in it! Good grief! This is the biggest thing in the fandom that bothers me. We’re so concerned about our image but too many will rush to the defense of a popular (or even unpopular) furry who engages in something so heinous! Same with those who engage with those who are below the age of consent! Eeek! Why are they allowed to run around in our circles?! It’s not a massive fandom like comic-con where tends of thousands of people show up at once. Yet they still are allowed to show up to cons and even be volunteers for activities at the cons. No! Stop that! *Baps with newspaper*

So these are just a few things I’ve had rolling around in my head lately as I see Twitter continue to explode on some of the drama lately. If improving the fandom and the image of the fandom is one of your ongoing goals, this should help a bunch!

Good luck and stay safe, fuzzbutts!

Silence the Negative Voices

Good morning fuzzbutts!

If you’ve been around here for a little while, you probably have a couple of good goals set up for yourself. You started putting in the work, pushing yourself to get those goals. You probably told some people, feeling pretty proud. They might have been happy for you. Then again, maybe they tried to talk you out of it.

Today I want you to protect your goals and dreams. There will be a million excuses to stop, sometimes all told to you by one or two of your friends and family. If you’re not careful, your big dream will become “too big” for you. People might mean well but they don’t know your life or hopes as well as you do.

So what happens when the outside world tries to “help” you by killing your dream? You cut them off from it. Don’t bring it up to them, don’t talk about your dreams to them, and don’t let them bring it up either. They might even ask you to settle on your dream. You don’t have to lose 50 lbs, you already did 20 lbs and you look great! No. You set your real goal already. Keep up the good work and keep the goal in your heart.

Watch your own inner voice too. When things get hard, you might go back to your default excuse of missing out on time or doubting your ability. I’ve heard so many people make excuses to avoid their dream job, as if it takes luck more than anything. One example is a non-fuzzbutt friend of mine wants to play guitar covers for recording studios. I’m not personally clear or what exactly it is. They make good money and it’s super fun, he says. “Why don’t you do it?”, I ask. “Well I need to learn sheet music and it’s about who you know.” is their excuse. So what? Sheet music isn’t so crazy once you get started, you know how to play guitar, and if it’s about who you know then try to meet those people. But nope! This guy has let his inner voice convince himself that his dream is impossible. It doesn’t matter that other people are living that dream and they had to learn sheet music and make connections. It’s impossible.

Don’t do that. You can do the thing. There’s no good reason to NOT pursue your dreams. If you put in the effort, you’ll run into some hurdles but you can overcome them as long as you stay on track and diligent. Don’t let anyone, least of all yourself, talk you out of your dreams or let you think you can’t really do it. You don’t have 1000 years to get your head in the game so let’s get moving!

Good luck out there, fuzzbutts!

Wednesday Tailtip: Checking in on Becoming Your Fursona

Good morning fuzzbutts!

So today I wanted us to check in on our personal journeys. A while ago during a health post I made, I said that rather than focus on just exercise, think of it as becoming more like your fursona (since the majority of our original characters have ideal body types). Well how’s it going? Exercising, still? Eating a bit better? Any progress so far?

Well I am. I took my running to the next level on a beautiful little hiking trail by where I work. I listen to motivational videos to push myself harder so I can get into the physical shape I need. As time has gone on, I even started improving my eating habits and diets. So that’s awesome. Progress is being made!

As I’m physically approaching my fursona’s type, now it’s time to think about the next thing. Do I have the good habits of my fursona? Does my fursona play video games all day? Does my fursona spread themselves really thin with a huge variety of projects or is he just really good at a couple of things. Do they focus on acquiring stuff or experiences? Well my fursona’s interests are things I also have an interest in. So why not focus on the interests since I find those fascinating already? It’s funny to feel like you should live vicariously through a character you created but sometimes that’s the perspective that will motivate you to improve yourself. I want to emphasize GOOD habits. If your fursona is dark and brutal, then focus on the positive aspects. Are they confident, strong, disciplined,or even free spirited and fun? Develop those aspects in your life.

Good luck out there, fuzzbutts!

Good enough just isn’t, sorry!

Good morning fuzzbutts!

Sorry for the delay this week. Have you ever acid-washed a pool? I have.

Earlier this week I got into a discussion with somebody who wanted to announce to everyone, including you, that you are good enough and don’t have to worry about changing. For those of you who read my blog, you know I consider that heresy for anyone looking to do more and better in their lives.

“Good enough” in my opinion, is a level of dissatisfaction that somebody considers less painful/more comfortable than sticking to your goal. It’s trying to go from 240lbs to 170lbs but stopping at 200 because you really want that burger and you hate going to the gym. 200 lbs is “good enough.” It’s trying to draw artwork at a level like Strype and then stopping at the sketch phase because shading is hard or you don’t want to learn to color or refine your raw sketch. Your raw sketch is “good enough.” It’s settling for a job because a promotion or your dream job requires you to go to school or get some extra training. Because of the extra unpaid work involved in advancing your career, your current job is “good enough.”

Everyone wants to consider themselves extraordinary in some way. I mean look at your fursona! You love being unique! So become extraordinary! Good enough is just settling for less. Don’t become “good enough.”

I’m not saying to be dissatisfied with your life all the time. Celebrate the advancements and small victories you achieve. Just don’t settle at a level that isn’t your actual goal. Keep working hard and push yourself to levels that you only dream about.

Good luck, Fuzzbutts!

Maintaining Productive Relationships

Hello fuzzbutts!

History lesson time! The famous Jim Rohn famously said “You are the average of the five people you spend the most time with.” End of history lesson.

For your homework today, I want you to sit down and consider the relationships you maintain. Are they productive? By that, I mean are you getting something out of the relationship? I don’t mean just tangible stuff like money and things. I mean “does this relationship help you feel better or drive you to grow as an individual?” Think about that. Maybe these people are more like drama llamas who sap your energy and expect you to save them from every crisis. Yet, between every crisis, they emphasize “Oh I don’t do drama.” Yeah ok…

I keep a very small, tight network of friends. I know a lot of people and can get along with a wide variety of furries. I love to learn from them and see how their lives are progressing too. Fursuit makers and artists are especially cool since I love how they turned art into a way to make a living for themselves. I have friends who pursued goals for their careers and just inspire others with their work ethic. Just by watching these people work to improve their lives, I feel inspired to do it in my own life to find ways I can do better for myself.

Then there’s the other people. I’ve known people who take in a known mooch, provide for them, and finally got frustrated with the mooch enough to kick them to the curb. They thought maybe they could “fix” this person who obviously didn’t want that. The drama llama always has problems. The friend of the drama llama can’t maintain relationships with other friends because there’s never time to spend time being happy with people because they have to constantly console the llama. The grown child just can’t take care of themselves. They have no idea how to do anything and just tag along. They don’t actually try to learn or adapt to situations and just have to have their hands held for any little thing. There’re toxic people who are just friendly enough to keep you around but take every opportunity to say something negative about you or one-up your achievements with their own exaggerations. There’s all kinds of people who aren’t going to help you reach your potential.

You need people to support and inspire you. Not some vulnerable pet for you to protect to validate your sense of power/ability. This is a two-way street! Just as they inspire and support you, you need to be a supportive friend who lives a life they will find inspiring in their own ways. Remember, you’re the average of the five. That means some people will be further along in their personal growth and some will be a little bit behind you but you’ll have something to learn from everyone.

So your homework is to review the people you most associate with. If they’re toxic, dump them. If they’re not toxic but they’re not inspiring, helpful, awesome, etc, then put a little distance to make room for the best friends. If you know people who keep you motivated and help you do better, then pull them in tighter and make yourself more available to spend time with them (talking to the introverts in the audience).

I hope you continue to grow yourself because personal growth is always productive.